Day 8: The necessary thorn

Life is a delicate dance. It is a dance between too far and not far enough. It is a quest for balance. 

On my journey to identifying and learning to choose brave, I've found that my struggle with fear also points to this need for this balance. On one hand, I fight my tendency to fear. On the other hand, I need this struggle. 

So to keep me from becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud.

Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.”

{2 Corinthians}

I hear the frustration, the battling in Paul's account. I hear the resolute submission. The thorn that's spoken of here could either be referring to a physical ailment or an emotional annoyance. It remains unclear, but this we do know: the thorn was purposeful. The thorn was necessary. 

Credit to Ken Watson

On a very small scale, I identify with Paul. I know the annoyance that plagues. I know the gut-wrenching cries begging for relief. I also know the grace given in response. Oh, how deeply I know that grace! 

Fear is that thorn for me. That annoying, pesky, uncomfortable, painful something that brings me to my knees. Everyone has something that brings them to their knees. Addiction, chronic pain, disappointment, that one cherished but very hidden sin. What is it for you?

I need this struggle. I need this thorn. Nothing makes me quite so needy. Nothing leads me to prayer so readily. Fear is the most common topic the Lord and I talk about. Without the thorn, where would the faith be? Where would the childlike dependence come from? 

I need this struggle. I still fight fear and choose victory in Jesus; through Him I am more than an overcomer. But I bless the something that pulls me down to my knees, out of the busyness of the running pace. It hurts, it annoys, I still imagine life without it. 

But I bless the necessary thorn.