Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Day 4: It's not about the whales

I did one thing that scared me this weekend.

Do you have something that scares you, like really makes your stomach flip flop, but you have no idea why and you’re not sure when it started? Do others think it’s irrational?

Well, that’s how I feel about whales. I know, I know they are not sharks. Yes, I’m probably over exaggerating. Try telling my fear that!

There we sat, overlooking the bay during one of the most mystical, beautiful fall evenings I’d ever seen. The sun was setting, the wind was low, sea mist lifted and fell, and the sky told a story with all of its wondrous colors. It was perfect. Almost. Every once in a while a little puff of air would appear in the bay. It was a whale! It was a pod of whales, in fact.

Shudder


I cringed and peered through one eye open, burying my face in my husband’s shoulder. My friends teased me and reminded me that it couldn’t eat me that I was up on a cliff, a good couple of miles away from them. Their words were true. But sometimes you can’t just reason away fear.

Fear. What is it?

We all know it. This example is a small (well, very large actually) sampling of my smorgasbord of fears. Some are irrational and silly like my whale-o-phobia, some are much deeper, soul fears. We’ll get there.

I’ve been thinking about why it is that whales scare me. And I discovered something. It’s not about the whales.

Fear usually has roots. It parades itself and announces its presence as the fruit that those roots produce. In my case, I think the roots of this phobia come from my fear of the unknown. I am terrified of deep, immeasurable, dark waters and the animals therein.   I am afraid of the unknown. I am afraid of what I can't control. Interesting enough, this same fear is one that could be the root from which other scared behaviors grow.  Hmmm.

Do you have fears? Irrational ones? Very real ones? Do some searching. Do some digging. What’s the root?


It’s probably not about the whales.


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