I'm talking the stick-with-it, messy, difficult-to-balance kind of love.
No, this is not another post about marriage, surprisingly.
Lately as I watch the news, read opinionated Facebook posts and circulating blogs, I am shocked over and over again with this thought: the world knows nothing about love.
Society says to love is to tolerate. To accept. To applaud anyone with an opinion because it's what works for them. To never offend. In this type of love, everyone is the ultimate authority on what is right and wrong. Which means- is there really a wrong anymore? Being "judged" is now just equal to disagreeing with someone; how many times do you hear
"don't judge me!"?
And so around we all spin, basing our lives and dreams on a foundation that we ourselves built with relativity. A foundation that shifts and changes with feelings as the ultimate guide.
I see this as quite an issue for the church. Society's voice is loud in saying "Accept me! Tolerate my life decisions!" Some churches, afraid to lose people, embrace tolerance letting their understanding of love shift to match the majority. "All are welcome here", they proclaim. Yet they shy away from the labeling and confronting of sinful behavior. Other churches swing to the other end of the pendulum by loudly (and sometimes abrasively) laying down the law, communicating the message that those who attend must be sin-free. A class system is created to distinguish the clean-cut churched from the unkept unchurched.
Both are so devastatingly wrong because they fall so devastatingly short. The result? Damaged humans. Either puffed up with a false sense of confidence due to lack of accountability, or wounded from the insensitivity of those who say they worship God.
Neither of these are the love I see flowing from Love Himself. The creator.
I see a gracious, dusty-footed teacher who interacted with a promiscuous woman at the well. He treated her with dignity by looking at her in the eyes as he spoke, for she was one of a people group Jews did not associate with. Yet he named her sin. And He loved her well.
I see a humble Rabbi, sought out by a young, rich man. Eager to understand eternal life, he asked questions. Then Jesus spoke the truth without shame. It was not an easy answer. And He loved him well.
Love Himself modeled a love that is both perfectly truthful and perfectly gracious. Love without either TRUTH or GRACE is not truly love. Our earthly rendition usually only includes one or the other.
Loving is hard. It's so not how we do things naturally. It's inclusive AND it's exclusive. It's built on the foundation of God's Word AND it's gentle and kind. Love means sharing life, welcoming sinners, treating people with dignity. It means saying "come as you are" but caring SO deeply that you desire and pursue transformation of the heart so that they can't stay as they are. When Jesus interacted with someone, the result was always transformation. He listened, respected, addressed sin and loved deep enough to propel them forward toward sanctification.
Love doesn't always tolerate or agree, contrary to popular opinion. It means holding the soul of a person close while speaking hard truths. It means accepting yet not tolerating habitual sinful living.
Loving is hard.
Loving takes courage. Let's be a generation of courageous (truth + grace) love.
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